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Public Transportation

March 19, 2010

Can't We All Be Polite Commuters?

HBB is a believer in public transportation.  It cuts pollutions, commute times and traffic congestion.

HBB is NOT a believer in acting like you have never participated in any of the basics of civilized society whilst using public transportation.  Haven’t mastered the use of a tissue, handkerchief or ability to keep your bodily fluids and cooties to yourself?  Then stay off vehicles which transport large numbers of people who actually are civilized and have no interest in sharing whatever viral or bacterial menace you have picked up and are endeavoring to assist in an exponential growth curve.

People want to go to work, or go home, not become a participant observer in a human size petri dish.

Please pay to use this service…if you are desperately poor and just need to get home, fine.  But the little brat rocking the iPod and designer everything can contribute to society by forking over the 1,20€ to ride the damn bus.

When getting on a bus, train or subway let the people who are getting off do so first.  The shoving to get on an immobile vehicle is something I have never been able to grasp.  Stop.  Think.  The damn thing is full.  If you let people get off first it is less full.  Then there is more room for your inconsiderate ass to actually get on the bus.  Keep.  Thinking.  The vehicle is not going to leave without you.  The driver actually is not blind, that is why he is trusted with operating a vehicle which ports dozens to hundreds of people around at any given moment.

Seating.  Some basics.  Your purse, shopping bag or laptop case did not pay for a seat, therefore when others are standing take the damn thing off the seat.  And don’t put your dripping wet umbrella on a seat…that is made for a human butt.  If you are an able-bodied person, give up your seat to the person who is obviously not.  This includes the elderly, the injured, a bustingly pregnant woman and yes, jerkface the dude with the prosthetic leg.  Courtesy would also tell you that the mom or dad with the six month old baby probably needs that seat more than you as well.

Inside voices please.  The idea that you can actually hear a person less than a meter away from you without speaking so loudly that a hundred people are aware of your impending visit to the doctor for a ingrown toenail is lost on one too many people.  Also, it is not cool to try to rub up against my girlie parts, just not cool.  You are not being subtle when you do this.

Personal grooming. Do it beforehand. Please shower.  Do not clip your fingernails on public transport.  Do not shave on public transport.  Keep your finger out of your nose if you are over the age of three.  If you must stick your finger in your nose then do not follow that by putting the same finger on ANY object which other people will touch.

Please do this all by tomorrow when I again embark on public transportation.

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